I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
