I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
