we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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