I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
