The Swedes wanted a tensome.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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