Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
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