We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
