Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
