Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize