no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
