i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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