I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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