best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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