it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I see more hoeing in ur future
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