Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
