this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
