I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
