R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
