Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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