i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize