You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize