would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
