oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I am one with the molecules
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
