She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
