I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
You pole danced in your parka.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Randomize