Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
