Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
We don't watch enough power rangers
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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