What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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