Kiss
Puke
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
