TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize