I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
