Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
