She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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