There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
My dick has a subreddit
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
