Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
