Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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