They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
