i need an iv and a liver transplant
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He passed out mid-signature
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
