dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize