i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
