I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
