I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
