Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i wish my penis had a tongue
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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