I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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