Me too!
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
