Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
