Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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