i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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