i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
