The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
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